Why did the woman stop making a sandwich for her husband? Because he's dead.

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How do you sabotage someone's car? Drop a fridge on it

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Why couldn't the girl climb out of the pool? She drowned

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Why can't a Tyrannosaurus-Rex clap? It's Dead.

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Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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So I was walking down the road today

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Why did the man fall of his bike? He wasn't on his bike, i drowned him yesterday.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? I don't know. He couldn't open it.

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Q. What's the difference between a Mcdonalds employee and a gynecologist? A. They have different jobs.

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A Girl Who was very close to er grandmother got a text from her mom who was very new to texting, she thought lol meant "Lots Of Love" wel it turns out the Girl's Grandmother Passed away Sunday Morning And the Mom sent the text to the girl saying " Your Grandmother Got hit by a truck and died lol" the Girl Killed Herself that night becasue Of her mom, LESSON LEARNED< LEARN HOW TO TEXT.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

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What's the only thing more horrible than trash can full of dead babies? A live one at the bottom. What's more horrible than that? He has to eat his way out. What's more horrible than that? He goes back for more. What's more horrible than that? This all took place in my garage while I was watching.

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Black people

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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Q: What is the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

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What do you call a Jew picking up a quarter on the street? A very nice man because a homeless man just dropped that and he was trying to return it. Rob W

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I went to Nebraska and saw a dead squirrel

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Are yu mad Twinkle twinkle little star if yu don't shut up I'm gonna hit you with my freaking car

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whats worse than being late to school haveing your family killed by an angry peice of toast

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Q: How do you break into your own house? A:You don't....thats ridiculous(:

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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