A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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A walks out of a bar and the joke is cut off by a-

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. Why did the man get a check in the mail every month? Cause he's black Why did Obama Cross the road? Cause he lost control of congress why is there all this blank space?

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Whats funnier than a dead baby tied to a tree? Everything, infant mortality is a very sad thing.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, no pun in ten won the contest. The man didn't think much of it.

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Why didn't Angie die when she jumped off the Empire State Building? She landed on a pancake

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What do you call when you see a man murder 8 black guys? The police.

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What was black, then white, now dead all over? Michael Jackson.

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eden stop

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Why didn't the sperm cell cross the road? It died from the intense heat.

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yo mommas so ugly that as a child she was often teased for her looks.

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Schrödinger's cat walks into a bar And doesn't

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Why couldn't Sally climb up the ladder? Because she was a paraplegic.

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a preist sees a rabbi on the street while taking a walk. he says hi and proceeds to have a nice conversation as they are good friends despite their religous differences

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roses are red, violets are blue, apparently you are blind or else I wouldn't be telling this to you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid the avoid the nuclear bomb at hiroshima

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What is less funny than a clown? Another clown ... but with fewer limbs.

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This is not a joke.

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What do you put in a toaster? Toast, oh wait, it's bread

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Tunechi

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What do dogs call gaseous exchange? Woof!!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A dozen burly firefighters ready to stick it in your pooper

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Adam Sandler is still funny ! *cough*

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because it would be hazardous to other motorists well-being.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops