Why did the women knock on the door? she needed to do a shit

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A man walked into a bar. He sustained a mild concussion and a brusied pelvis

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knock knock who's there the german police now pack your stuff and get out

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How many people does it take to kill the president? A number

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what do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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What's bigger then a bowling ball? What? Your mom!

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Tunechi

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What did the scientist call a spider? An arachnid.

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Knock knock. Racism.

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A man accidentally forgets his daughter at a Sizzler

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You mom is so fat she appeals to my secret fetish.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I doubt it thought much about this. The chicken is a simple animal, and i doubt its actions were spurred by any particular motivation.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

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Whats worse than 10 dead babies In a tub 10 and 1/2

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WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN DANII AND SCAFFHOLDING? ONLY ONE STILL HAS A POLE 1 LIKE = 1 TEAR FOR DANII

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How are JFK and Jimmy Neutron similar? They both had brain blasts.

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What happens if you confuse your male best friend's and your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, their both named Adam.

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Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

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What happened to the Californian who drove off into the sunset. He died. You can't drive in the ocean.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you f***ing racist.

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What did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They didn't. She was a blind deaf-mute, there was very little she could do wrong

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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