Your mumma is so fat she was mistaken for an opera singer in a quite awkward confrontation. she was embarrassed and walked out crying

A man walks into a bar Ouch

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender shoots him.

What happened when rudolf bucked Santa? Santa ripped his hooves off and started hitting his nose until it stopped glowing

What did the man who was having Deja Vu post on this website? What did the man who was having Deja Vu post on this website? What did the man who was having Deja Vu post on this website?

What's brown and sticky? Vomit.

What did the falling bridge say to the other bridge? Well bridges can't talk but if it could it, then it would say AHH! I am falling

Why are there so many black men in the NBA? Because they trained hard and practiced regularly to get there..

knock knock Who's there? The repo man Why? You're being evicted

Why couldn't the skeleton cross the road? Because it was dead, thus incapable of independent movement.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey. Why did the other bird fall out of the tree? It was shot. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

What did the deaf guy say to the other deaf guy? Nothing.

Q: What's the difference between a stick in the road and a baby in the road? A: You swerve around the stick

What has an orange t shirt A dick I lied about the shirt

Q: What were Peter's emotions after he bought his $2 million house? A: None, in fact he has no home, family and anyone to help him. his leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

If one train is heading North at 60 mph, na danother train is heading South at 45 mph, how many waffles are on the roof? The answer is purple, because aliens like coffee.

Two black men walk into a strip club. They immediately walk out because they have faithful wives at home nurturing their beautiful African children.

why did the the chicken cross the road? because some sad,board people wanted to make a joke

Your mother's so fat that affects her self esteem.

What do you call a man bathing with a toaster Electrocuted

My friend billy had a ten foot.... Garden hose. Upon showing it to the neighbour next door he hit it with a rake which significantly shortened it and subsequently had to buy another

Why was the blonde in the bathroom for 2 hours. She had to pee really bad.

I kinda said I did not want to know, sooo... Want to meet up tomorrow? Like for realsies? In that case tell me first (then show me tomorrow as proof), your cough... Vagina, I dont care if its shaven or not, but does it have red hair?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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