what did the caterpillar say to the butterfly? Im gonna turn into you.

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Why did little Jimmy cry when his Rolls Royce got destroyed? Because his parents were in it.

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What do you call four friends spending a wild night in Las Vegas that they can't rember the next day? A rip off of the Hangover

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Romans rights.

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Man 1:Doctor Doctor, I've got 59 seconds to live! Man 2: This is a chemist

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A horse walks into a bar, and a man says "Hey, why the long face?" The horse calmly turns to him and replies, "Because I'm a horse you drunk moron."

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A Polish man is walking down the street carrying a brown paper bag. He runs into one of his buddies, who asks, "Hey! What's in the bag?" The man tells his friend that he has some fish in the bag. His friend says, "Well, I'll make you a bet. If I can guess how many fish you have in the bag, you'll have to give me one." The man replies, "I'm sorry, my friend, but gambling is against my morals, especially when my family's only nutrition for the week is on the line."

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Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

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vaginas are pretty!!!!

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Why did the baby cross the road? 'cause i kicked it.

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A man says to a woman, "hey, bitch, shut your fucking mouth you goddamn hooker." Most hookers are used to it.

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Samraj.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint the side of a building? I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.

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There was an american man on the way to work.

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a man said hi.

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How do you make a little girl laugh. You tell her something funny.

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why did josh pick up the quarter because he's a jew

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There was Jew, a black guy, an Asian guy, and a Mexican guy at the store. The store was called Walmart.

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Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven.

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Knock. Knock Who's there? Jim. Jim who? Jim your best friend.

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how many black guys goes it take to screw inalightbulb? just one, but inalightbulb was feeling rather slutty today, so 2.

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Paragnormal Activity: The confused sequels. My wife literally had an heart attack 5/5! -Awesome reviews. I am going to need therapy for the rest of my life! 5 out of 5 stars! -Star reviews THIS MOVIE KILLED MY DOG! 4.5/5 -Petlovers I literally died! 10/10 -Rotten Potatoes.

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What's worse than a dead baby? 2 dead babies

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Q-- Why did the boy stop playing football? A -- He had to go for his tea

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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