What do you call 500,000 white guys jumping out of a plane? There's no such thing. 500,000 people can't fit onto one plane.

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What d u tell Simba when he's moving to slow? Muvasa

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What do you call a black man who goes to college? A scholar.

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the man the invented it doesnt want it, the man that wants it doesnt need it, and the man the needs it doesnt know it....what is it? a coffin.

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Q; What is pink and has 2 legs? A: Not a lot of things, but a Flamingo is the closest thing that I could think of if you do not count the beak eyes and feet.

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Knock, knock Who's there? Man Man who? The man who is knocking. Now open the door Carl!

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What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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Twenty-Four

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? No idear.

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died.

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Hey, Batman Yeah? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents!

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what does the NAACP stand for? Now Apes Are Called People.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Dead.

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3 guys walk into a bar....dont you think one would see it ?

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It is so hard to write an antijoke.

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How do you kill an already dead man? You don't he's already dead.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? I don't know it really depends on the car, usually about 2 in the front, 3 in the back and... That's about it

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There's two people, one wearing a nice sweater and the other is not. The one without has to walk the dog, so he asks the other guy if he can have his sweater. He says "No but you can wear it."

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how do you get all the people in ireland out of their homes? roll a potato down the road. how do you find the richest person in ireland? you find the one who got the patato

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool The tragic drowning of a quadrapalegic

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How many fingers does Charlie Sheen have? 8. and 2 thumbs. just like most everybody else.

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What do you call the man who graduated medical school last in his class? Doctor

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Why is Santa fat? Because the apples are red.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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