What do you call a comedian who can;t make people laugh? A bad comedian.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light-bulb? Probably one. Replacing a light-bulb is a pretty simple task which any person (regardless of ethnicity) should be able to do without assistance.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My room is a mess, Violets are still blue

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What do you call a really small grape? A grape.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill. Jill was dehydrated.

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Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It died. Q: Why did the snake fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird. Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Peer pressure.

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knock knock who's there? a murderer. a murderer who? a murderer who kills you and your family.

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There's two bears in the shower. One bear says "pass the soap". The other bear says "no soap. Radio".

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What did the man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Oh my goodness! Are you alright?!"

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What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.

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Q: Why did the girl fall off the swing? R: Because she had no arms.

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If a tree falls on a woman and there's no one around to hear her scream why did a tree fall in the kitchen?

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Why has Bugs Bunny got big ears? Because he's a rabbit

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What happens when you walk by two black men? You walk by two black men.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Put her in a circle and tell her to sit in the corner.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Milkman! Milkman who? ....Timmy....I've been coming here for FOURTEEN YEARS! AND YOU CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER MY NAME?!?! I drove your mom to the hospital when you were born since your father is such a deadbeat. I helped pick out your name!! I'm sorry I wasn't born into wealth like you. I'm sorry I have to go door to door handing out milk for other people! I have been coming here every week for FOURTEEN YEARS! But no Timmy, no, don't try to remember my name. Just forget about all the laughs we have had. Or that time i left my family on Christmas because your mother needed me to go find you that Turbo man doll. I saved you from a burning vehicle! I helped you win your third grade science fair! Remember? I have a picture of us and that robot right here in my wallet. I show it to people all the time! Here's me and my...my pal Timmy. Well Timmy, this is it. You shan't see me again.

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Why did the coconut fall out of the tree? Gravity.

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Who is Jonathan Ezell He is Jonathan Ezell

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A man calls 911 911: hello? Man: sorry wrong number.

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My penis is so big that some women find it uncomfortable.

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chuck norris

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How do you stop your child from picking his nose? Cut his hands off

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Did you hear about the guy who fell out of the stands at the ranger game? He died.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? he was epileptic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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