What's the difference between a baby and a mushroom? One is delicious, the other is a mushroom.

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What's brown and sticky? Poo.

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A little boy starts to be followed by a man in a large white van. They come across an intersection, the boy turns left, and the man turns right.

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what do you call a cow with no legs? ground beef

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What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a tree? Nailing1 baby to 10 trees

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Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash? The pilot and three passengers died.

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There was this guy who walked in the bar with one shoe. The bartender asks what happened. The man said the shoe didn't fit. So the bartender ask where is the other shoe. The man said he threw it away. The bartender looks in the trashcan and sure enough he sees his other shoe. The bartender says "This is the same size as your other shoe. Why are you wearing one shoe?" The man says "I'm just playing a prank on you. There's a hidden camera over there and over there. Is it okay if I can put you on YouTube?" and the bartender says "No."

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There is a bomb. It blows up and kills 26 people.

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What has two wheels and a handle bar? A bike.

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What do you call 500,000 white guys jumping out of a plane? There's no such thing. 500,000 people can't fit onto one plane.

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Why did the chicken kill himself? Because he was bullied as a child and is now suicidal

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who's that hot blonde at the disco? your mother.

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When we was Antarctica and it was cold we would huddles arounds a candles. What did we do when it was colder? We lit the candle,

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Q: What is the difference between a Ginger and a shoe? A: A shoe has a sole

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Knock knock. Is someone there?

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Knock Knock! Come in!

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What is funny about a child with down syndrome? Nothing.

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Q: What dosent a Jew and a pizza have in commen? A: The pizza dosent scream when you put it in the oven.

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How do you make a Nazi mad? You slash his tires.

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Why was the man sweating? He was stuck in a burning house.

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I can't see my forehead

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YOU

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What did the murderer get for Christmas? Executed.

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Hey, look under there! Under what?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops