how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family

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Whats fuzzy and greenand if it falls from a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

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Cavan keely's the type of guy who drives past hilltown screaming GET IT THE VAN!!

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As little Timmy crossed the finish line his heart raced with excitement he had just won the big race. Later he and his family went home to celebrate they had pizza and chips and soft drinks. Then they played scrabble and watched spiderman 2. After that Timmy went to sleep. When his parents found him that morning they mourned and mourned because their hero little Timmy was still asleep.

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Q: what animal didnt get on Noah's ark in pairs? A: worms. they got on in apples.

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How do you keep a secret? Kill yourself.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Nobody knows, he was hit by a car.

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Why did the man's legs start shaking when he saw the attractive women? There was an earthquake

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Q: What comes first the chicken or the egg? A: Pineapple.

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christimas? A: Cancer.

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A blonde sits down in first class on a flight to Miami. That's because she had a ticket for the seat.

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if life thows you lemons ILLUMINATI CONFIRMED

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press Ctrl and F4 on ur key pad

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Q: What's big, brown, and smell like crap? A: Turd.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

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What do call a limbless man swimming? Dead.

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What do Jews, Muslims and Blacks have in common? They are all valuable members of the community and should be treated no differently from anyone else

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Why did the orange fall asleep? Because its never awake.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Why is black people's skin darker? Africa

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whats dead and gone your nanas cat

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Whats Something everyone has except david? Money.

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call 803-389-9808 for a good time ;D

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Yo momma's so fat, her lifespan is probably going to be very short and you will have to bury her soon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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