Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

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An alcoholic walks into a bar.... I forgot the rest of the joke but your mother is a prostitute.

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What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

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This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

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Can we still mine for gold in the American River? No, anyone seen mining for gold is considered a hobo and all the gold is cleared out by random people in the 17 century

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Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

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What happened to the black man when he was hit by a truck? He died.

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What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

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What happened when barba opened the coca cola? The cap flew off and hit the fence then the train then the moon then the pillow then the sun then the pole and the pole fell and hit the baseball and the cap landed on the floor... Then my turtle died

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What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

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What is funnier than Miley Cirus getting a Record Album? Justin Bieber's voice.

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whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

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What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

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What did the black guy do when he heard sirens? He Ran

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why did the baby fall down the steps? Because there was big earth quake that blocked his parents on the other side of the house, therefor leaving no one capable of getting to him befor falling

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A clown walks into a bar and orders a pie. After about 2 minutes, the bartender gives him a pie. Later, a blonde walks into a bar and orders a cake. After about 1 minute, the bartender gives her a cake. Then a dog walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything because it's a dog.

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If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

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Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

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Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

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Weaner

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Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

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What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

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What did the spoon say to the other spoon? Nothing, it is a spoon.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was really frogger in disguise

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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