One time I said to my friend, "There are too many black people in this country." I forgot he was black.

I am a mime

A blonde woman, a brunette woman and a redhaired woman walk into a bar. They can be considered fiscally responsible because it was two for one Ladie's Night.

Yo mama so old, she must take arthritus medicine to keep out of extreme pain.

Why couldn't Jimmy eat his food? Because I threw a microwave at him

Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

Do they censor Ass? TESTING TESTING ASS ASS ASS

Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

Why did Johnny fall off his bike? His father never taught him how to ride one as he was an abusive alcoholic who abandoned Johnny's mother when Johnny was 3, so he is not very good at riding bikes.

What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

(two firefighters are climbing an undersea mountain in Brazil) Why do elephants fear the natural causes of silver icecream cones? Because the cars in the parking garage jump the moon while doing jumping jacks.

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

what do You call a white man killing a black man? a accident

Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

An Ethiopian fell into an alligator infested river. He ate 7 of them before he got out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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