How do rocket scientists exchange greetings? They say "hi"

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A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, did you know you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate replies, "Arrrgh, there's been a horrible nautical accident. Please call an ambulance immediately."

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Three black men was in a car. They were going on holiday.

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What did the white man say to the black man that was very interested in the story he had to tell? Cool Story bro, tell it again!

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What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin sons? Nothing, his wife had an abortion.

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What did the dog do in the phone booth? Nothing, as dog do not have opposable thumbs and cannot grip objects. The previous user must have left the door open and the dog walked in, only to leave a few moments later.

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Why was the man scared? Because he was being attacked by a giant tiger.

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How do you get out of editable poly? You don't.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A scholarship to a prestigious college that he did not deserve.

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You dropped something.... Yo lip

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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Does an albino chameleon turn different shades of white?

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Why should you never eat a jellyfish on a Wednesday? Because it will sting you with its poison.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Lebron traveled

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Yo mama is so stupid that see should really be concerned with furthering her education in a four-year university

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Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

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My brother gave my mom AIDS. My mom gave my dad AIDS. My dad gave my dog AIDS. My dog gave me AIDS. I gave my sister AIDS. My sister called the police because of the wild case of AIDS.

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I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger. Then I got stabbed.

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A man questions wether a cat will always land on it's feet. He takes a cat from a pet store and tosses it into the air. The cat lands on it's feet. Startled, the cat runs into the street and gets hit by a car. The man goes to prison for theft and animal abuse.

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whats sad about 4 black people in a cadalic fallign over a cliff? it wasnt there car

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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What did George Washington say to his men before they got on a boat? Men, get on the boat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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