Why didn't Rosa Parks get her fat black ass up? Because she was an avid partier and had anal with roughly 8 different guys the night before.

Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? Billy was a loaf of bread.

Making fun of Charlie Sheen is like shooting up in a barrel.

Yeah, "master hypnotists" (and do not even get me started on hypnotherapists, they completely suck!) keep claiming that you need to keep up to date with the "constantly developing art of hypnosis" The thing is though, that hypnosis does not develop itself, people develop it further, and when the key ingredient is actually believing things under a certain state, you can do anything, even slow the passage of time to a halt. Once I tried that, I was disappointed when I figured out that it did not work, so I went shopping (for groceries), then realized that no time had passed at all, sounds like bullshit, and yeah I wont be trying that again anytime soon, lucid dreaming is good enough, you can spend hours and hours in a lucid dream state, days, and then wake up and figure out you slept like two hours or something.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called anti joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

why did the Chinese guy take steroids? He didn't he's naturally small.

Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

Whats worse than the death of a celebrity? An anonymous person posting a joke on this site.

What is a taco made out of? A. Various ingredients ranging from cheese to sour cream.

Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

What's the difference between a microwave and hamster? They're both furry except for the microwave

Knock Knock Who's there? After no response, the man chuckled as he realized the sound of his TV mimicked that of his door knocker.

I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

Haikus are easy Im happy when I write them Thats pretty much it

How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

What are the differences between a black man and a park bench? One's a chair and ones a person.

What did the average man say the the bird? HOODINI

How many mentally challenged beings does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well one couldn't do it so adding more to the equation will only make it worse sir.

why was the boy sad he had a frog stapled to his face

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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