whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? I don't know what they said, but one muffin, had a knife.

What do you call a person driving a plane? Not a pilot, they fly planes.

i saw amango it splootered

what would happen if every overweight person in america jumped at the same time? they would all get a little exercise.

what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

Q: how do you get a clown off a swing? A: You hit it with a axe

Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

What do you call thousands of people running through london? The marathon

What did the Asian say to his racist friend? You're racist

Q: What causes earthquakes? A: Your mother walking.

What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? A: Fssshh

Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the user is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

Listen Supervisor, this is Agent Clarke of the GOV and the WHO, I suggest you respond ASAP, I suggest you put set me in touch with either Lady, or Axel Knight right away, this is a matter of your personal security.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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