What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge.

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

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Q: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: The pizza does not scream in the oven.

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A banker makes some poor economic investments with other people's money. turns out the people can never get the money back. the banker walks away like nothing happened. the government does nothing to prosecute the man. Somewhere in there his wife leaves him.

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN cil you have such a dirty mind

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what do a blonde and a brunette have in common? They were both red-heads until they walked into great clips.

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Why do white people not eat crackers? Cause it's cannabalism.

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Where did the two Jews ride when they got married? In the back of the oven.

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America's Got Talent WIN! Britian's Got Talent WIN! Mexico's Got Talent WTF!

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Q: why did the white man buy a burge A: cuz he was hungry

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How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

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Your moms so dumb that she has cancer..... wait thats racist

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How do you get into USA from mexico? Climb a fence

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the bully said, you're just small fries. the fries couldn't help it someone ordered a small!

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Why did the hobo break both of his arms? He didn't like them.

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This planking craze is really taking over... my elderly nextdoor neighbour has been planking in her garden for three days straight!

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Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

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why was the boy sad? because his mom just punched his hamburger

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Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

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what did the aboriginal kid get for christmas? your bike.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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