Knock Knock! Whos There? Little boy blew! Little boy blew who? Micheal Jackson....

Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

What do you call a black midget in space? The first true example of how hard work, dedication and sacrifice can help you to achieve your goals.

How do you kill a baby? You take a gun and shoot it.

a dyslexic man walks into a bra and realizes he is quite lucky as another man walks into a large steel pole

what did the man say to the person he hates? nothing!

How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so therefore i must be a pig

Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

why Is the teen's sock crusty? he stepped in the glue that his little sister was using for her art project.

Knock knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its babies were being mauled by a cat.

A man walked into a pole barn oh wait I meant a pole bar so it actually hurt.

3 black guys are in the back of a car. Who is driving? A taxi driver

Roses are grey. Violets are a different shade of grey. Let's go chase cars. -Dog

Why did rachels computer break ? Because she was using it in the road and got hit by a bus

Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

What's windy and sunny at the same time? The weather.

A guy walks into a psychiatrist's office covered only in Saran Wrap. He asks the doctor, "The strip of metal teeth is missing from the box, so could I borrow your scissors?"

how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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