How many amish people does it take to screw in a light blub? None as the amish don't require artificial light

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shirt and blue, i call this one snow white, to score and seven years a jo, six samurai kageki, coral, 50 piece, specific frame, whats with that one, amy, hoption, smell my butt, smell my balls, smell my fart, smell my poop, urgay, pringles,

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Eric went for a poo in the public toilets. After he finished, he realised that there was no toilet roll. So he had to just pull up his pants and put up with his sshitty arse for the rest of the day. Unfortunately, he was in a board meeting and when he went in he stank of shit and it was a very uncomfortable feeling.

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Your mother is so fat that she will likely eventually develop diabetes.

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Matthew Baker

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Knock knock? Who's there? You have cancer.

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Yo mama so stupid she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death

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Chuck Norris has a chin under his beard.

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What's black and White and black and White? A nun falling down a stairs

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Why were the black mans hands all sticky? He was helping orphans with arts and crafts

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How did the drug addict die? He got shot in a drive-by.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

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Why did the horse insult the postage stamp? He didn't. Horses can not speak English nor can anything verbally or physically critique a postage stamp and make it feel any emotional distress.

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What do you say to somebody that wont shut up Shut up!!!!

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What do you say to a homeless man sat in a train station? That there is a homeless shelter around the corner.

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Ask me if I'm a cucumber. Are you a cucumber? No.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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So 2 guys are curious if there is baseball I heaven... So they say when either of them dies they have to come back as a spirit and tell the other man if there is baseball in heaven One of the guys dies and comes back as a spirit... He comes to the other man and says... I've got some good news and some bad news The man says what's the the good news? The spirit says the good news is there is baseball in heaven So the man says what's the bad news?? The spirit says... Your pitching Tuesday night!

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Why did Jimmy never like old people? Because he was abused as a child by one.

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Girl you must be Jamaican...because you're black and annoying.

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How do Germans treat the Jewish? Kindly, and with much hospitality.

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WHY DID THE MAN RUN A MILE?.BECAUSE HE WAS TRYING TO CATCH HIS NOSE AND GET A TISSUE

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How do you get a elephant in a fridge? You open the fridge and put it in. How do you get a Rhino in a fridge? You take the elephant out and then put the rhino in. All the animals in the animal kingdom are at a meeting, what animal isn't there? The rhino, his in the fridge. How do you cross a river full of alligators? Walk across the allligators are at the meeting.

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A Jew walks into a bar. It's a bar full of Neo-Nazis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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