I am a mime

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Q:your jetski loses a wheel. how many pancakes does it take to fix your house? A:blue berry icecream.

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How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

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I took your mother out for a classy steak dinner. I decided not to call her agian because we weren't very compatible and the conversation was very superficial.

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Yo mama so old, she must take arthritus medicine to keep out of extreme pain.

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A blonde woman, a brunette woman and a redhaired woman walk into a bar. They can be considered fiscally responsible because it was two for one Ladie's Night.

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Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

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Why did Jack like oranges? - Penis

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How you know when dislextic

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what is funnier than one dead baby in a dumpster? There is nothing funny about the homicide of a minor, and the murder should be immediately investigated.

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What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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An Ethiopian fell into an alligator infested river. He ate 7 of them before he got out.

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what do you make if you get a cow, then kill it. ...Steak

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A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

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A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

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Two black guys were walking down a street to meet up a local drug dealer. Turns out the black guys were undercover cops who arrested the drug dealer and both recieved awards for finding the criminal.

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

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If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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