How many Jews can you fit in a car? - Probably about 5 or 6, depending on the car.

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

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What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

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How do you get your dog to stop barking? You snap its neck.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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A child walks into a bar. I swear those jungle gyms are too short.

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Whats better than 1 person in your oven? 9 people in your oven.

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civil rights

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What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

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Why did the police arrest the black man? He'd committed a crime, and was punished accordingly.

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When you aren't feeling well, you should see a doctor like this: https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcS5u4lryU5PzmLUKCGEKZgDWMeQ_96VLEKFGu7Wvk-4M7UXHkOXBw

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And you honored it I see :P

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And now a word from our sponsors

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Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

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Why did the dish run away from the spoon? None of them ran neither one has legs

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why did suzie fall of the swings? because she had no arms.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well why wouldn't it?

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A guy dared his friend to jump off a bridge for 10 bucks. His friend, fearing for his life did not jump.

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Why did the virgin masturbate until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

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A:You wanna here a good anti joke B:Yeah/sure A:Me too

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is promptly called and the duck is released in a nearby park in a safe and risk free process.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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