How do you make a sausage roll? Wrap some sausage meat in a pastry dough made of plain flour, water, salt and fat, and bake it in an oven.

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Baby you're so hot I have an erection the size of an average penis.

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Read This line it the tune of "If your happy and you know it" If you're reading this, Do your homework. Sincerely, Your Teacher

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I took your mother out for a classy steak dinner. I decided not to call her agian because we weren't very compatible and the conversation was very superficial.

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What did the penis say to the vagina? Cover me, im going in.

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Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

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kara is funny she loves her money so she buys a bunny for her honey

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Sure, I was not born yesterday, sounds serious, what is it?

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Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.

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one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A hat

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What do you call an arab with a beard? How cares what his name is just shoot him!

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The teachers cat is a fat cat and his name is ... why do even whant to know you stalker

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Why did the black man jump off the cliff? Well , you see, this black mans name was yargle, and during his high school years, people always made nicknames for him some of which were fat yargle, yargaryar, and bottomyarg. He thought to himself that wanted revenge, So he killed the entire population of earth. Oh ya, and since he was the last human, wirhout possibility of reproduction, he went to the store and bought a can of soup

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I'm a psychic. Don't believe me? Think of any number between 1 and 20. Got it? Your number is 17. Please comment if I got it right

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look im not better than you, your a ten im a two your a queen im a fool you got looks i got scares u got talent i got beuty to its a win win

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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What is black and white and red all over? Interracial sex partners with smallpox.

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This is my favorite antijoke.

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If a red house is made out of red bricks, and a blue house is made out of blue bricks, what is a green house made out of? Green bricks.

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Why couldn't the journal cross the street? Because there was a red light.

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Yo mama is so fat, she just had a heart-attack.

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what did the thief say to the man that lost his car? i stole your car.

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Why the babie was not drinking his milk? He was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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