what did the man say to the other man he bumped into? sorry. and they never saw eachother again

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting yours asshole clawed by a grizzly

What happens when you rub two penises together? Gay sex.

What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

one man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. when he was drinking the beer he choked and died

Knock Knock Whos there? Jason Oh, ok come in.

Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

What's better than winning the special Olympics? Getting laid at the special Olympics.

roses are black violets are black i am blind

Why did the plane crash? Because a tomato was the pilot.

Why did the audience leave disappointed? Low budget and poor directing.

Man hears son masturbating in room. The dad enters the room and tells him "Son if you keep jacking off you will go blind". The boy replies "Dad I"m over here".

Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

What do you call a Muslim Extremest at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible tragedy for the Muslim community.

why did the crops die? because a deranged clown sprayed them with liquid nitrogen.

What do Kobe Bryant and a toaster have in common? They both rape white women. Except for the toaster.

knock knock who's there? A worm, your dead in a coffin.

What is the difference between Sarah Jessica Parker and a horse? Sarah Jessica Parker is a human being who is also a very skilled actress A horse is a animal which is usualy kept in a barn

What's green and has wheels? The White House. I lied about everything, I'm so sorry.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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