Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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Miss Jones has 10 apples on her desk. Billy takes half of them away and runs. What does Miss Jones have? 5 apples and a complaint filed for smacking Billy with a ruler.

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Whats invisible and smells lile carrots? Rabbit fart

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What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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Communism hehe xd

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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A student asks a teacher: Sir, how much time would it take for me to do this quiz. Teacher says: From the second I give you this test to the second you hand it back to me.

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OMG I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST WEBSITE YOU SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT OMG ITS http://anti-joke.com/submit

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Q: Why did the little girl fall from the swing? A: Because she didn't have arms. Q2: And why did she fall from the swing again? A2: Because she tried to get on it again.

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What's black, blue, red, green, white, purple, orange, yellow, etc.? Last I checked, a bunch of colors

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Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

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What did God say to the man who just died? Nothing. God and Heaven something parents make up so kids will do the right thing.

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LeBron in the fourth quarter

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If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

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What's hot and cold at the same time? Hotcold.

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How do you keep black people from your Kool-aid? How? You put it in a safe-deposit box.

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What building has the most stories? The Burj Khalifa.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a pop because he was a designated driver

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Why don't dinosaurs eat other dinosaurs? They're all dead.

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How did the Cuban get into Florida? Well he got his passport and other papers, flew in, then went to Customs.

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would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

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How do you get dislikes on anti-joke.com? You can dislike your own post from several different IP addresses.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops