What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands soft and her nails long Nothing at all

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What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

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What did the smoker say when he coughed? Ohhh dam it's turned into a smokers cough

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We are unhappy, unfilled because we cannot complete our dream, it is always about us, then again, is wanting the best for others being selfish?

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Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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What would Jesus say if he was alive today? “Nehwê tzevjânach aikâna d'bwaschmâja af b'arha.”

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A rooster lays an egg on top of a henhouse. Which way does the egg fall? Roosters don't lay eggs.

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what did the boy with cancer want for christmas? a gun

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Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

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What did a husband do when he came home to find his wife murdering their children? Nothing. There is no excuse for domestic violence.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? ?? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a police officer.

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No

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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Knock knock Who's there? Your mom Oh hi mom

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roses are red violets are blue heres the oven now where the **** is the jew

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Where did Suzy go after the explosion? - Everywhere.

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What did one new born baby say to the other new born baby.? Babies don't have teeth therefore they are unable to talk.

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roses are red violets are blue do i care? no.

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you can either take the test now or on monday. (hand movement)

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Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

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What do a black man and a dog have in common? They're both going to die some day.

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why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

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look im not better than you, your a ten im a two your a queen im a fool you got looks i got scares u got talent i got beuty to its a win win

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It's that time of the month again... ...to cut my toenails.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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