How do you kill a blonde? Stab her with a knife.

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did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

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Why did the man not get his licence He was blind

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Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

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Why did the little boy fall off his bike? He was hit by a truck.

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What happens if you drop a baby of a cliff It dies

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How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

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Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

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My wife asked me to prepare our son for his first day of school. He's a ginger so I punched him in the face, and stole his lunch money.

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Have you ever had Ugandan food? Neither have they.

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Hi, how are you doing? Good, yourself? Fine, thanks. Have a nice day. You too, bye.

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Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

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if you are reading this your wasting your time

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What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

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A jew walked out of a bar then goes to the other bar across the street then walks out from the back door to go to another bar The Actions of this jew tells us that there are only 3 bars in the zone and one pet shop

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why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

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Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

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When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

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What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

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Q: I have a bed, but never sleep, I have a mouth, but never speak. What am I? A: Stephen Hawking

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What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

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Q: What's black, white, and red all over? A: A horribly maimed zebra.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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