what did the philosopher say, when he considered the transient nature of life in relation to ones own personal and egocentric grasp upon circumstance and purpose? massive erection.

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Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

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My name is Jacob Mckeand and my penis is as long as Mr. Macs hair.

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a man dyslexic into bar walks a

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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Is that a gun? Or are you forcing your boner into my back? Or is it something completely different that shares the physical characteristics of guns and boners?

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Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

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Why can't Micheal J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he has Parkinsons..

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers who are you?

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A hairy monster walks into a bar. It was halloween.

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Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

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An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? dead parents.

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What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

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Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

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Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

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What's the difference between a black man and a orange? One is a fruit and other isn't

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S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a gun, get in the van.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cock was on the other side.

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Q: What do you get when you have water, sodium C14-16 olefin sulfonate, glycerin, disodium lauroamphodiacetate, polysorbate 20, cocamidopropyl, betaine, PEG-6 Phenoxyethanol, PPG-15 Stearyl, Ether, Citric Acid, isocateth-20, Fragrance, Methylparaben, Tetrasodium EDTA, Xanthan Gum, Propylparben, Ethylparagen, and Camelia Sinensis Leaf Extract? A: All New Clean & Clear Oil Free Make-up Dissolving Foaming Cleanser.

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Three friends were walking to school, they all looked in front of them and ran away. What did they see? A 200 ft dragon eating their school.

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What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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