The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

Yo mama is so stupid that see should really be concerned with furthering her education in a four-year university

What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

What do you call a blackjack man driving a car? An average citizen.

How do you get Suzy to get off the swing? Ask her to move.

If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

I am the best i am the worst My wife was buried in hearse

Math Problem: John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

How many electricians with a suitable ladder does it take to change a bulb? If the bulb fitting is now obsolete it may not be possible.

why was the albino black crying? because all babies cry you racist

Your mom is so environmentally conscious, she recycles a great deal.

Why was the woman on video chat? She was videochatting with her husband, he was out of town.

What is worse then your car getting hijacked? A 900 pound man eating a Donut.

HAHAHAHAHAHA.....shut up your joke isn't better.

Why did the black man have no toes? Because during his climb of Everest, he got frostbite and they had to be amputated.

Why was the road crossed by the chicken? Because as an animal, incapable of understanding human languages and consequently lacking in education, it was unable to understand the convention of not using the passive voice in English prose writing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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