Yo mamma is so skinny, she has developed anorexia, a serious eating disorder, which not only affects her, but also the ones that she loves and cares about.

How do you leave a guy in suspense ...

What is white and weighs twice as much as Shamoo? My ass.

What did the dog do in the phone booth? Nothing, as dog do not have opposable thumbs and cannot grip objects. The previous user must have left the door open and the dog walked in, only to leave a few moments later.

Knock Knock, Who's There? Not Ann Frank because she died in the Holocaust along with 6 million other innocent people.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Barack Obama. Ok, come on in Mr. President!

Wath black poeple eat for christmas your food.

How did the chicken get to the other side? He crossed the road.

Roses are red, my binoculars are blue. When your window's open, i'm watching you.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "I have a gambling problem."

what is the difference between a jew and a boy scout? a boy scout comes home from camp

What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

my friend got in a car wreck,he lost his left arm and left leg. how is he now? Hes all right.

Your moms so dumb that she has cancer..... wait thats racist

What did the boy skip rocks with? -A rock

WNBA

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

John had 50 candy bars and he ate 45 what does he have...... Diabeaties

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have Cancer."

Why was Tommy late for school? He got raped by spiderman.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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