Why didn't Susie do her reading homework? She is blind and her school system cannot Afford to teach her to read braille

What happened when the man asked the girl if he could borrow her pencil? Nothing, she was deaf

A boy is diagnosed with terminal cancer. His family prays for him and he still dies.

Hey, I want to because you are really sweet and deserve it, and damn you are hot, but thats secondary in your case, in every case actually, otherwise I would just be doing it with meat whose soul and thoughts I hate/dislike/detest/etc, and that is not who I am. Once huh? I mean I said night/day/shower/breakfast table... Not so sure I can last for that long with a girl as hot and sweet as you for that long. Kidding, hey, best friend huh? Wow, I mean that`s really sweet, and you are really a special friend to me, but uh, to be honest, best friend? I barely know you... I hate this part of myself, I am blunt with that honesty thing, I may just have insulted you, but you know, I also need to be able to live with myself If I am going to enjoy life.

mike:what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas tom:cancer ahahahaha mike:he got a skateboard jerk nararrator: this skate board will be worth less because he has no legs

There is a Asian a black guy and a white guy the black guy loves apples the white guy loves pears and the Asian loves Macaroni the white guy gets a apple the black guy gets a pear and the Asian has no lunch so the black guy kills the white guy for the apple and the Asian kills the black guy because he is hungry

Laughter and joy... You are really sweet you know.. Excuuuse me princess! But Like Mickey Mouse never changed... From a Potato peeler to some fuckup private detective in a trenchcoat. So tell me, what character did Walt Disney draw before Mickey Mouse?

Whats so funny about the women bringing fast food home for her family? Nothing shes a single mother who does'nt have time to make food between her two jobs.

One time I said to my friend, "There are too many black people in this country." I forgot he was black.

A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

Thats the magic of Moral Man, I do not make people my bitches, they curl up and do it all for me. Moral: HEEEEEY BITCHEEEEEES! WAZZAAAAP!

What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

what happened to the chicken who crossed the road he didn't realize that the light was green

why did I fall off a tree? cause i wanna to

Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

Why did the Cross chicken the road? Because it wasn't the way to the Lord

why did the blonde put on a coat? because she was cold.

whats the strongest muscle the man who can't talk has. definatly not his mouth

What does a black person and ebola have in common? They both kill people

Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

What did the snowman say when winter was ending? -Nothing you dumbass

There are two kinds of people in the world: Those who can count and those who can't.

Q: Why God never got a PhD? A: 1. He had only one major publication. 2. It was written in Aramaic, not in English. 3. It has no references. 4. It wasn't even published in a refereed journal. 5. There are serious doubts he wrote it himself. 6. It may be true that he created the world, but what has he done since then? 7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited. 8. The Scientific community has had a hard time replicating his results. 9. He unlawfully performed not only Animal, but *Human* testing. 10. When one experiment went awry, he tried to cover it by drowning his subjects. 11. When subjects didn't behave as predicted, he deleted them from the sample. 12. He rarely came to class, just told his students to read the book. 13. Some say he had his son to teach the class. 14. He expelled his first two students for learning. 15. Although there were only 10 requirements, most of his students failed his tests. 16. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountain top.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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