Q: Why didn't Little Jhonny go to school today? A: There was no school today.

Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the light bulb and two to file a lawsuit.

What is black and blue, with nothing to do? The prostitute in my basement.

Why did octopus cross the road? Because the road was underwater

Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

B==========D-------------------------- im pissin man! god!

What's black and white and red all over? A dead Zebra

Why was the boy crying? Because he was told he would never find a wife

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cock was on the other side.

I have alzheimers and one day me and my nephew were............................

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

what did the dog say to the cat? bark what did the cat say to the dog? nothing it ran away

Why was Blue looking for her clue. She was drugged by a stranger and ended up inside of Mailbox.

Did you hear about the man with the bicycle? He was 2 tired.

whats nun plus nun two nuns haha!! from jarod :}

1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

who is really lanky? james cornish

Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

Why was the blonde confused? Because someone was dressed in a chicken costume throwing pinecones at her.

what did the little boy say to his sibling? dat not funny!

What did the bank clerk say to the robber when he demanded all the money in the drawer? "Okay."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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