Shakespeare walks into a bar, Having just seen someone that has been dead for over 400 years, the young man in the corner quits his drug addiction; it was clearly messing with his brain.

What did one bunny rabbit say to the other bunny rabbit? I'm a bunny rabbit!

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? One second let me count them.

A blind man who spoke English and a deaf man who used sign language went to a bar together. Although they didn't communicate they had a wonderful time.

White NBA players.

your mother is such a nice person that most people enjoy her company

Why was Jimmy upset? Someone kept pouring liquid nitrogen on him.

A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

What happens when a plane with 2500 people on board crashes? There were only 165 seats.

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? YOU'RE UNDER ARREST! GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR! NOW!

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Eight, because there's one tickle per tentacle!

What is the difference between a Camel And a Strawberry? A strawberry is red.

What did the senator do after he typed he email? He clicked the send button.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

pudding

What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both live underground apart from the eagle.

What do you call an elephant mixed with a rhino? A freak.

Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

Friends are like trees, they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

Why did the CEO step down? Because he was very ill and could no longer meet his duties and expectations as Pear’s CEO.

Two girls were taken away mysteriously in the night. The next day, no one cared because they were orphans.

3 guys are in a car crap manners and shut up.shut up is driving and crape falls out the window so manners goes and gets him. A cop pulls over shut up.he goes what's your name son?shut up.where's your manners boy?over there picking up crape.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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