What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

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What did Billy Mays eat for breakfast? nothing, he's dead.

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Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he...

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How many dead guys does it take to build a shed? None. The contractor did it for 40 dollars an hour using maple wood.

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knock knock who's there? me josh! come in.

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What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

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Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit.

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What do you call a guy who likes men? Gay

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All the other kids with the pumped up kicks died in a school shooting.

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Q: What would have been the easiest way to stop the second world war without killing anyone? A: Paid Hitler for his art.

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why did the chicken cross the road it didnt it got eaten

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What's 1+1? 69.

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Three Jewish men walk into a butcher. They dont buy any pork products and thank the butcher for his services.

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A guy walks into a bar and says, "I'm Japanese". The guy at the counter says "What a coincidence! I am Japanese too." He gets seated and the guy next to him says, "I'm Japanese too." The bar is in Japan.

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Roses are red violets are blue ice-cream is yummy can I eat you

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what do you call a black drug dealer? A pharmacist.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Does this rag smell Like chloroform to you?

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There is a bunch of penguins and they fall of a cliff

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

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Why did the boy get coal in his stalking. Cause he wants to be a geologist and that's what he asked for.

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If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops