What is worse than finding dead parents? Not finding them.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did Schrödinger's Cat cross the road? It didn't

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the cat cross the street? It didn't. I cut off its arms and legs so it couldn't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the plane crash? Because a loaf of bread was the pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what did the woman say when the guy told her he liked her christmas tree? thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool then don't let her come up for air.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

thumb_up thumb_down -5

The last person on Earth is sitting home alone when suddenly there is a knock at the door. Knock knock Who's there? *silence* Damn this joke got creepy...

thumb_up thumb_down -5

When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb, one to suck my dick!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What look likes a rocket, uses Mc Donalds wifi and takes off from Fairlawns Avenue Kevins House not instigating it was all Taggart

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

p

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting stabbed.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what did the grandma do after she was pushing up daisies? washed her hands because gardening is a dirty activity

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you stop a black man from running? You shoot his knee caps.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops