KANE AUDITIONS FOR BRITAINS GOT TALENT SIMON COWEL REAPES HIM

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What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

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Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

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Why did the chicken croos the road? It didnt, my father caught him and cooked him for dinner.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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Your mom is so fat she weighs significantly higher then most females of her age and height.

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bite me

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When u send someone fudge, u must send a note along with it! Roses are red Violets are blue Fudge is brown Here's some fudge

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knock knock who's there? your destiny

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Guess what? What? You guessed correctly.

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What is green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? An elephant I lied!

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Why did the boy fail his maths test? He had no eyes due to a vicious bear attack earlier that year so couldn't read the questions or study from books resulting in him not being able to complete the task he was given.

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What is small, yellowy-white and emits a kind of cheesy smell? A lump of cheese

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Your mothers so ugly that when memory sees her it says " Damn-it I hate my job!

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wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

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When life gives you lemons, refrigerate them so they don't go bad.

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Knock Knock. Hello Frank! How'd you know it was me? There is a window next to the door.

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Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

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Jesus Christ

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A priest, a nun and an Irishman walk into a bar. The barman says 'what is this, a joke?'

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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One, two, three, four and five

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Why was the protester on the floor? Because the protest had become a riot, and police brutality is a serious issue.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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