Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

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Why did the policeman who's third wife just lost 20 pounds go to sleep? He was tired.

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what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

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A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

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Q: whats white and smells like shit A: my ass

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Why did the old lady walk across the road? She was on her way to the convenience store on the other side.

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knock knock whos there micheal jackson too soon

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Dick Cheney That's the joke

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What do you call a dolphin mixed with a cheetah? I have no idea I was hoping you knew.

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What was so incredible about this bigger new oven i just bought? It could fit twice as many Jews in it. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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why did the crops die? because a deranged clown sprayed them with liquid nitrogen.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

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KNOCK KNOCK who's there? OUCH! what's your door knob made of? nails?

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Q. Why couldn't Billy see the pirate movie? A. Because his mom didn't let him.

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Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

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why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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A little girl was curious about where people come from so she asked a very controversial question. Girl goes up to her mother and ask "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mother replies "Ask daddy." Girl says "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Father replies "Ask the dog." Girl then goes up to her dog and says "Doggy, where do babies come from?" The dog doesn't reply because it's a dog.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

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A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

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mary had a little lamb its fleece was white as snow and everywhere that mary went this joke has no punchline

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What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A cigarette that is or has been damp so that the nicotine was able to bleed into the paper and dye it.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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