Why did Sarah fall of the swing? Because she was very careless and swung too high.

If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

Pikachu says "Pikachu!" Squirtle says "Squirtle!" Charmander says "Charmander!" Ash is upset because he cannot communicate with his Pokemon in their foreign tongue.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

What do you call a alcaholic walking down the street..... Roadkill

what do you call a ginger......... billy and mickee.......

What's worse than losing your job? Getting repeatedly hit in the face with a brick after getting fired from your job.

Why was Johnny sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because death was certain if it didn't.

Two men walked into a bar. Only one came out. What happened? One Passed out.

U are with a jew a Christian and a muslim, you walk in chicken shop, thw lights close, and all of a sudden, hitler and a vampire pop up. Which one do you kill? The jew.

Two cannibals are eating a clown one turns to the other and asks "does this taste funny to you?" The other cannibal says " yeah because the clown has been dead for weeks."

A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

What did they do with the drunken sailor? Gave him the sack, which meant he could no longer provide for his family.

How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

Yo mama got so bad teeth her dentist said she should get them surgicly removed and get lifelike dentures

A jew walked into a bar Hitler said.... A jew walked out of a concentration camp

Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

What do you call a someone who steals from a black guy? A thief.

Why don’t stores sell mouse-flavored cat food? It’s a matter of marketing; tuna, chicken and liver flavors sound much more palatable to the humans buying the pet food.

what happened to your carpool? they died.

Why did Jimmy's grandma never come home ? Her liver failed .

Why was the Muslim crying? Because his brother got hit by a bus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...