Why did the girl call suicide hotline? Cuz he wanted to kill herself.

whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? babies aren't fruit.

I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

Roses are purple violets are green I am color blind shut up

I had a terrible childhood. My mom abandoned me before I was born.

What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

Who does creatine? James Cornish

a black man walks out of popeyes

What's worse than getting punched in the balls? Many things inflict more pain than that

Why did the man die after getting his picture taken The camera was a gun

A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, then suddenly dies of a heart attack.

Yo momma so fat, she was recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and is at great risk for developing heart disease!

what happened to the frog that had a car accident, nothing it's dead

B=boy G=girl B:hey i got a good nock nock joke but you have to start it G:okay nock nock B:whos there?

A man walks into a bar. He tricks a lady into smelling a rag doused with chlorophoam, and rapes her.

A generous manager, an honest lawyer, a responsible politician and a dodo bird fall off a cliff. Who survives?. None, they are all long since extinct.

What's clear and looks like water? Water.

A man is eating in a restaurant and says, "Waiter! There's a fly in my soup!" The waiter says, "I'm sorry, can I bring you some salad instead?"

"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

What do you call a black man who lands on the moon? An astronaut...f*cking racist.

Why did helen keller's dog run away? He lost track of his destination and got lost.

Why did the man rob the house? He had a horrible childhood which led him to making these bad choices.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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