There was a horse in a very hot sumer day. He was in the middle of corn field It was so hot that the corns started popping out. The horse thought it was snowing and died of cold.

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You are in a room with hitler and bin Ladin. You have a gun with 1 bullet. Who do shoot? Don't worry you don't have to make that decision. They are already both dead

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Fred and DooDah go to their favorite lake to fish. After getting out on the water, DooDah hooks a huge fish, which pulls him overboard, and he drowns. Fred is brokenhearted and goes to tell DooDah's wife the news. She opens the door and hears Fred sing: "Guess who drowned in the lake today? DooDah! DooDah!"

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Why was Mr. Smith always so sad at the block party? His uncle molested him as a child, when he was 10 he finally told his mother. His mother and father later fought if they should tell the police, the mother wanted him to go to jail, and the dad didn't want to ruin his family because the uncle was his brother, and the uncle had children. Right before his mother would call the police his father stabbed her in the back, mr smith saw what happened. Him and his father hid his mothers body and mr smith"s dad told him if he tells anyone about this he will kill him. Years later when mr smith was 13 he went on drugs to ease the pain, he later became an addict, and dropped out of school. He know suffers from depression and has killed all 3 of his wives. He is wanted in many middle eastern countries. So when ever he goes to sleep he has the same dream were him mom offers him pot and right before he gets it his dad stabs her in the back. So know mr smith is sad at the block party because he will kill himself later tonight.

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I love results day! for every A* I get 30 pounds! everything else I cut myself.

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How do you get rid of black people in your back yard? Politely ask them to leave.

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A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

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A man walked into a bar. He got drunk and left.

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A cat playing laser tag.

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died Why did the other boy fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third boy fall out of the tree? Prepressure

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Knock Knock. Who's There? I have cancer.

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What do I hate? people

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What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? A fat kid sitting on you

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What do you call a fat jew? A person that most likely has an eating problem and needs to seek help from the nearest rabbi

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Did you hear about the kid from Oklahoma? Yeah, he died.

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How do u get a dog to sit? Teach it to sit then tell it to sit.

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I am quite mature.

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What do you call a Jew in the oven? The oven repair man

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

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Why did Mr. Moseley choose to not buy crest toothpaste this month? Because your daughter got an abortion.

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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Q. Why did the fence break? A. Too many mexicans were climbing it.

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Columbus Day... A day to remember the anniversary of Columbus enslaving America.

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Why did the student have a staring contest with his teacher? Well, the teacher was actually unaware of the competition.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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