Knock, Knock Who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill your neighbor. Can I have some flour?

What do you call an animal with 4 legs ? A dog...

What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

Just got back from the corner store. Bought 3 corners.

Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

2 bald men are standing on an oval, one turns to the other and says "leukemia."

Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

Once upon of time, there was an ugly duckling. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

Why couldn't the immigrant who was brand new to America hold a conversation with anyone? He was mute.

A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

Im about to rewrite History....... History

Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

Why did the black guy get a boner? The nitric oxide levels in his trabecular arteries and smooth muscle of his penis rose, causing his arteries to dilate and therefore enlarging his penis.

2 men walk into a bar, the 3rd man ducks and ask them if they're ok

Why does everybody hates Justin Bieber? Just leave that girl alone!

I'm not saying my mother-in-law is fat, because she is anorexic.

Why didn't Johns book get published? He had dyslexia.

Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

What's worse than a dead baby? A dumpster full of dead babies What's worse than that? One is still alive at the bottom What's worse than that? It had to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It came back for seconds

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...