Q: Why is Little Johnny in the hospital with a bullet wound and a broken arm? A: I shot him of his bike.

Why did the dinosaurs become extinct? Because they wanted to.

Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

What happens when a chicken with a goat have sex? nothing.

What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Probably "Look out for that car," but since he has been deaf since the age of 7, his verbal skills are tenuous at best.

What's the difference between a goat and a cherry? You can't put a goat on top of your ice cream.

What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

What did the little kid say to the stranger? Nothing. He was taught not to talk to strangers.

Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know... I thought no one knew the answer to that question...

Q: Why were minorities denied access to the bathroom? A: It was for employees only.

What's worst then a parking ticket? The plague

What did the platypus do whenever he walked into the bar? Nothing. It's a platypus, they don't do much.

A guy walks into a bar and laughs. Later, a green, homosexual dinosaur dentist escorts him out to play a houdini banjo.

how many baby's does it take to paint a wall?? depends how hard u throw them

Why couldn't the T-Rex give anyone a high five? Cuz he's dead.

whats the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari. I don't have a ferrari in my garage

A seal walks into a club.

what happened to the slut last time she opened her legs. a bee flew in and stung her. turned out she was deathly allergic. she died a painful death.

Whats the difference between a black man and a picnic table? Alot of things

Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: "There goes my income. I dont know how I'll support my family now, or keep my crops alive."

Jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams,heat does.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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