Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

why do some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because they can be extreamly delishus and satisfying to eat. Why dont some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because then we would all be too big to fit on earth.

Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

Roommate 1: I want to make food but I'm not going to Roommate 2: Why not? Roommate 1: Because I'm tired and lazy.

1657 is a cool number, when a leprachaun sings it sounds like pie drinking an obese penguin (do you know what I mean....) :D

When life gives you lemons, squirt the juice in life's eyes. Then life won't trust you with lemons.

Why did Phil Krahn cross the road? Because he is gay

i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

Someone just commented on my joke! ... oh wait it was myself

Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

Why didnt the vampire have a reflection? You have to be real to have a reflexion

Why did the Polish man cross the road? Because the doctors was across the road, and he had a doctor appointment in five minutes time.

a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

"Torture the orphans as much as you want. Who they gonna tell? Their parents?"

Why did the pirate get kicked out of the pirate movie? He killed 7 people while looking for treasure under the seats.

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

Kid: "Tell me about when you were young, Grandpa." Grandpa: "Oh, sonny, those were crazy times. My friends and I were out of control. We used to give each other wet-willies and funny arm. We'd play dandy-balls and legs-a-spread and penis-butt." Kid: "Sounds kind of gay, Grandpa. " Grandpa: "It was gay. Everyone was. But, back then, we were called pole-fancies. It was real, good old-fashioned "grab the nearest tree and hold on for dear life" gay, not today's fancy, featherbed, thread-count gay. People got hurt back then! Kid "That's gay." Grandpa: "Yeah, it was pretty gay "

Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

Why is my penis so small? No, seriously, can anyone tell me?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...