What is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite.

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A magician tells the boy to get into the box and locks him in. He wasn't a magician.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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why did your mum die young because she had canser

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was among thousands of men who were also from Nantucket.

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who would win in a gang battle? WEST COAST SWAG

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How old am I? If you guessed correctly, you are psychic. If you guessed incorrectly, I will send flying gnomes to capture and torture you. Unless, of course, you are of a racial minority in which case nothing will happen to you because I am not racist. :P

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What did Jay Z say to his long lost friends? Allow me to reintroduce myself, my names Jay - Z

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autistic kids rock

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Did you hear about the comedian cereal killer?...He raped his victims before strangling them to death.

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A blonde goes to school, and completes a difficult math problem.

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What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

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Whats SxB-Tin+Shack+b= SB FUCKING B

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What did the man with no head get for Christmas? Nothing he was dead

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Dwarf Shortage

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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What do u call a black guy that sell drugs? A nigga

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What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

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Jamie: Peter your hands smell like cows! Jason: eeh no they smell like cows balls

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Why did the princess kiss the frog? She really wanted a wart.

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What happened when the nigga looked up his family tree? A gorilla shit in his face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops