A man is walking on the beach and notices a shiny brass lamp on the ground. He picks it up, polishes it and then sells it for a reasonable amount of money at a local pawnbroker.

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What is the Pirates favorite letter? C

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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a man decided to climb a tree. he got to the top,raised his arms above his head and said "I am on top of the world ". after that he fell because he was not holding on to anything

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How do you make a mime talk? There are many ways. I prefer a baseball bat with a nail through it.

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A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

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Why was Jimmy upset? He wasn't.

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Q:What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A:Lick-a-lotta-pus

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Why was the boy mentally retarded? Because his mother was a tree

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? It's a trick question. Feminists can't change anything.

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How to make a plummer cry Kill his family

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

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why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

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Penis, eggs, mushrooms and tigers

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Sex

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What's Donald Trump's favorite color? Green.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was getting chased by nazis.

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I ounce had a parrot it talked buy never said im hungry so it died

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A fat guy!

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Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

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Roses are Expensive. Violets are Gay. Poems are for pussies... Have a nice day!

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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