Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the kid tell his father? Go away, I'm watching elmo!

thumb_up thumb_down

What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

thumb_up thumb_down

what did the duck say to the monkey.............. QUACK!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did Lisa let go of the monkey bars? she was being molested

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

thumb_up thumb_down

How did Helen Keller's parents discipline her? Hopefully not too sternly. There's not much trouble a blind and deaf girl can get into, one would imagine.

thumb_up thumb_down

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They beat her mercilessly.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

thumb_up thumb_down

WHAT HAS MAN BOOBS THE SIXE OF JUPITER BOMBER NEVILLE

thumb_up thumb_down

Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: Why did the black man drown? A: Because he couldn't swim.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

thumb_up thumb_down

Whats the difference between a girl and a guy? one receives and one delivers.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did Ben Franklin Invent Bifocals? He's a jive turkey.

thumb_up thumb_down

What blew the baby's mind? Daddy's knuckles.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is the difference between a black person and a bicycle? You can sell a bicycle legally.

thumb_up thumb_down

why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

thumb_up thumb_down

Roses are grey Violets are grey Colorblindness isn't funny And neither are you

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

thumb_up thumb_down

Dane Cook makes a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down

what do u say to a man walking down the street nothing, u shouldnt talk to strangers

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops