If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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Who is the dumbest person on the entire internet? Shortpoet-GTD

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How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

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What's the one good thing about being a paraplegic? Nothing.

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What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

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Why did Jimmy's grandma never come home ? Her liver failed .

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Jokes are dumb. Stories are better. Did you ever hear the story of the blind man who walked into the fish market and said, "Evenin' ladies!"?

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Male leadership.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an axe

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what is green and red and goes 100 miles per hour? frog in a blender

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says, I'm sorry but you have about four to six months to live. The man goes home and checks his million dollar life insurance policy.It expires in three months.

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How do you make a hormone? Modify bacteria using recombinant DNA technology.

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Q: How did the man walk across the road? A: With his own 2 feet!

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How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, because they weren't made. Cupcakes were made instead. Sorry, Muffins.

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okay, there was a donkey and a parrot walking at the park. When it was raining the donkey says to parrot hey why is it so hot. Then a person riding bikes come to the parrot and she told her to sit down. Nobody saying hello but she can dance reallly nicely.

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A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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Life gives you lemons you make lemonade. What do you do when life gives you melons... youre skrewed.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he just got paralized from the waist down and will never be able to walk again.

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what is my catphrase nothing I am too good to have one

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How many ADD kids does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're people to you know...

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Q) Why did the Koala fall out of the tree A) Because it was dead!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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