A kid goes into the ocean on a boogyboard and then gets eaten by a shark because the shark thought he was a seal.

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What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

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roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

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Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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why was the fat man excercizing? because he was a fatass and no one liked him

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because earlier that day, the chicken was taking a shiit, and when he went to wipe, there was no toilet tissue, so he ran upstairs to his parents room, and shot them both with a shotgun, then he ate them while they were still gasping for air, then the neighbors heard the gunshots so they came over to make sure everything was alright, but little did they know that the chicken planned for it and they were electricuted to a crisp by the fence, oh yeah, why did the chicken cross the road? Because the store for chips was across the street

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

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Q: why does batman die in the end of dark night rises? A: he smoked got cancer and died.

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despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

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roses are red violets are blue start sucking my dick or ill kill you

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Why did the boy fall off the swing?

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What do you call a alcaholic walking down the street..... Roadkill

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Roses are red Roses are also white and Violets are Violet not blue. Also I'm a realist and your grandmother is going to die soon

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A. Why did the boy cross the road? B. Why? A. I don't know! That's why I'm asking you.

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a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and bacomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into shit.

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What do you call a girl who can run faster than me? Virgin

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A man was shot. He died.

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why did the kid drop his toy? a dog was ripping out his throat

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot. You racist.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I don't know, you answer the door.

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What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

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…What did you put in the drink that made me fart, and kill my horse?

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im trying to thing of a good joke...oh wait i got one but only one... ok ready?...oh wait...i forgot it again

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well he graduated in four years with a degree in chemical engineering. He worked hard all four years in order to keep his scholarship to the university. Now he leads a very successful life and lives in a large house with his wife and two children.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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