- Anti Joke

Dont be racist be like mario he is an italian who looks like a mexican speaks english and picks up coins like a jew.

Why did the woman go in a elevator with Ray Rice? Because they were both going to the 25th floor and stairs would take too long.

roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

mary poppins' handbag is full of dick

Q: What did the clam say to the postman? Moral: "Hey its me the worlds only talking clam! How you doing dude!"

How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

Why didn't 6 like 7? Because 7 was a huge racist.

Q: How do you kill a Brazilian Blind Electric Ray? A: Killing endangered species is a crime.

Why didn't the 12-year old boy eat his birthday cake? He has diabetes and would likely die from the increased spike in insulin.

What's orange, brown, and blue? An orange, brown, and blue object.

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

I'm pretty sure you can't throw a fridge...

“Ok, time for bed” … is what I said to the empty living-room. It was getting late, and the internet no longer amused me. I picked up my cell phone, rooted through the couch cushions until I located the remote, and turned off the television that had been nothing but background noise for the last few hours. I made sure the front and back doors were securely locked, walked around the back of the couch, and turned off the only light. A tap on the screen of my phone created just enough light to keep from busting a toe on an errant table leg. Because my cats have an evil tendency to lie in the middle of the hallway, I aimed the small amount of light from my phone directly in front of my tired and shuffling feet. I’d only covered a small distance before I knew, from many nights of this same regimen, that I was getting close to the bedroom door. At this point my arm started the slow upward arc that would eventually illuminate the now pitch-black opening to the comfort of my room. The light emanating from my cell was quite dim, and this action had become quite rote, so my arc was about waist level before I noticed a slight variation of the familiar black of the open doorway. At that point, and in a disturbingly short amount of time, five things happened nearly simultaneously: My arm, the arm carrying the phone, continued to rise in its predetermined arc, having been an object in motion which would stay in motion. I released a small gasp and exclaimed to my husband that his sudden appearance in the dark had startled the breath from me. I remembered that my husband was at work. The light arc reached its apex on a face of protruding nail-like teeth. A face suspiciously bereft of eyes, with a gaping, oozing, bloody pit where a nose should have been. The light went out.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Dont be racist be like mario he is an italian who looks like a mexican speaks english and picks up coins like a jew.

Barney is a pedophile Loves dino molestation Stuck a dildo in his ass And died of constipation

How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

What is a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

knock knock who's there? your destiny

Q. Where do all funny jokes come from? A. The people who made them up

How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

What is black and white and red all over? Zebra domestic violence isn't funny.

What do you call a truck full of dead babies? Not enough.

why was the Jewish person accused of stealing money? because the police found his finger prints.

what is big, white, and can't climb a tree? a fridge