A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

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why did the boy die? because he got shot

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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Why couldn't the immigrant who was brand new to America hold a conversation with anyone? He was mute.

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what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

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What did the gay black man say after JFK was shot? Wow thats really sad but I have such an appetite right now so i should probably go to eat.

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Q: What's black, white, and red all over? A: A horribly maimed zebra.

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What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

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Ehh

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

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Why did the KFC worker dislike his job? He was paid lower than minumum wage due to the plummeting economy.

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Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

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What do joe greene and joe biden have in common? Their first name

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Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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What did the fish say after it's head was cut off? Nothing, it was a fish.

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What's the best part about having sex with twenty eight year olds? They've reached sexual peak but aren't yet past it. Plus, they still aren't in their 30's.

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My peni s

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“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -I do not believe chickens like being questioned of their motives. We should leave them alone.

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your momma is so fat she eats a lot of things

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Knock knock. Knock knock. Knock knock. I'm hammering nails. Knock knock.

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How about that airplane food? Ive never been on a plane you tell me

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What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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