What do you put your key on? A key chain.

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Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

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What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

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Why did the Albino cross the road? He was going to the skin pigment store.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

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You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

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Steve Jobs is alive.

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why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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What has two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

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why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was going to meet up with his friend who happened to be Irish.

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Neither have I

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

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Why did the... Timmy, your mother and I are both tired.

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What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

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Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

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What's the difference between Tom and Jerry? One is a cat, and the other is a mouse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops