Where did little Timmy go when the bomb dropped? Everywhere.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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What do you do when a sing is stuck inside your head? Put a gun to your head, and shoot the song to death. It will work. Trust me. Youll never hear the song again. Or anything again.

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What did the Asian say to his racist friend? You're racist

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Why can't you fit 100 oranges in a bathtub? Because motorcycles don't have doors

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What has 8 legs and makes women scream? .....Gang rape.

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One day a duck was swimming on the lake and sees an alligator. The alligator says "You will be my next victim." The duck says "Quack."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, he was hit by a car. I lied about him crossing the road.

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on a planet, in a galaxy, far far away... you have cancer

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2 squirrels with 2 massive boners and 1 little boner.

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Cancer.

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what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercourse? I have aids

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... I have Alzheimers... CHEESE ON TOAST

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A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this!" The doctor replies "That because there's a knife in your hand."

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How do you make an onion cry? Onions are incapable of crying

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Q: You know why the floor is so clean? A: Because the janitor puts a lot of hard work into it.

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Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

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What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean? Sploosh

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2 black people and a mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The black person because they decided it would save gas if they all carpooled to their job.

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Q:Howd the blind kid find his way home? A:He didnt, he got lost and died of starvation.

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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How can you tell the difference between a black guy and a white guy? skin color

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the batmobile? 'Get in the batmobile Robin'

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Why was the man alone? Because he was tied to a tree.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops