I got shot in the balls now i'm pregnant?

How do you make a hobo cry? You steal his trash.

What does a handsome guy and an ugly girl have in common? Nothing

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? This site.

What's worse then a bad hair day? Hattie.

Redcunt? You got to try being nicer if you want a proper answer

A boy plays in his garden. Then he fall and his knee hurts a lot, but he doesn't cry. Do you know why? Because he's dead.

In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

the awkward moment when your mom wakes you up and you realize she died six years ago

I like my wine like I like my children... Eight years old and locked in a cellar

asking someone to check ur broken wing mirror to fall into that persons arms by accident is not a good idea

Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

Roses are red Violets are blue Plants are green because of the high levels of mitochondria in their cells.

how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

when u cant say fuck say firetruck because it starts with f and it ends with uck ?firetruck?

Q: What would have been the easiest way to stop the second world war without killing anyone? A: Paid Hitler for his art.

whats big and green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a snooker table

Why did the shrimp refuse to share? Because he was a little shellfish.

THER ONCE WAS A jueny WITH A TEN FOOT WENNY AND HE WENT TO SHOW IT TO THE LADY NEXT DOOR SHE THOUGHT IT WAS A SNKE SO SHE HIT IT WITH A RAKE AND NOW ITS ONLY FIVE FOOT FOUR!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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