"It smells like up dog in here." "What's up dog?" "Not much, what's up with you?"

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I love bacon therefor I love people who eat bacon execpt people who eat my bacon then I hate people who eat bacon

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What did the pig do when the farmer died? He just stood there cause pigs are stupid.

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If life hands you lemons... Question yourself what just happened because life isn't tangible and has no way of handing you lemons, and even if it did, why lemons?

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The neighbours challenged me to a water fight so I am updating Anti jokes while i let the kettle boil.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. On of them was moderately amusing and took home the modest prize.

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How do you make a unicorn? Jab a stick through a pink horse and name it Liam

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What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

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What did the atheist say as Jesus walked past? nothing, he ran to the nearest bar and called the insane asylum.

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What do you call a dead blond in a coset? Last years hide and seek winner.

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When you say that Chuck Norris has counted to infinity twice. I say that you cant count to infinity because it isnt a quantifyable number

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Once upon a time there was a man exercising, he pulled a muscle and had to have his heart removed. In other words, don't exercise. The end.

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an man of hispanic descent ran into a pole his white friends proceeded to laugh at him not because he was in pain, but because he was different

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Yo Mama so stupid she thought "Dunkin Doughnuts" was a basketball team.

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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Why is Osama dead? He got shot.

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How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

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Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

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What's worse than finding out your friend is gay? Being gang-raped.

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How do you get to pigs in a pen? Move them.

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why does stuart own alot of hollister because he is autistic

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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Roses are black. Violets are black. Everything is black. I'm Helen Keller.

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What's the coolest place to be in the solar system? Uranus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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