One day a duck was swimming on the lake and sees an alligator. The alligator says "You will be my next victim." The duck says "Quack."

What is black and blue, with nothing to do? The prostitute in my basement.

What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A victim of an alcohol related car accident

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

What do you get from M&M bags? M&Ms.

What's wrong with black people? They tend to make mistakes, as do all humans

Where are you going Your house

I think everybody should have a penis.

what did the dog say to the cat? bark what did the cat say to the dog? nothing it ran away

Why was Blue looking for her clue. She was drugged by a stranger and ended up inside of Mailbox.

The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

They say that men are from Mars, and women are from Venus. If that is true, then who on Earth are we? [L]

What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? ProtestS from Anti GM activists.

Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

Why couldn't the infant read the book? Because he was blind.

A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

what did the dog say to the cat? nothing cause animals dont talk.

A person was born on may 5th 1955 and one day noticed that they had $555.55 in their bank account. The person went to a race and betted all their money on the 5th runner in the 5th race. What happened? The runner came in 5th place.

A Jew with a boner runs into a wall, what hits first? His nose

What do you call a shoe with milk in it? Shoe

Whats the difference between a penis and a vagina? Pancakes,

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because the amount of times people reused this joke on this site made her so annoyed much she wanted to hurt herself.

Why did little jimmy fall of his bike? His grandma threw the refrigarator at him.

A cow and a goat are at the top of a hill. The cow starts to eat the grass, and the goat says, "Hey! That's mine!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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