Why did the blonde make pasta even though she had a gluten allergy? She had some Italian friends coming over. Also she bought some gluten-free pasta and sauce so she wouldn't need to be hospitalized.

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When life hands you lemons, make lemonade. Well, life isn't a physical being so chances are low that it will actually hand you lemons.

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knock knock who's there? Jehovah's witness GOOD BYE!

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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What's the most confusing day in Mexico? Father's Day.

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What did Sally get for Christmas? Who's Sally?

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S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

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Look down at your keyboard. Notice that U and I are together? <3 Also notice that J and K are together too!:P

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I don't drink. I'm not 21.

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

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Why couldnt the man stop dancing? He had Parkinson's.

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Whats worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two busses.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not sally

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Don't you hate when you finger your belly button and your nipples exploed?

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What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

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Knock Knock Who's There Carly Carly Who Hey I just met you, and this is crazy So here's my number and call me maybe

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What did Nick Comado say to the black person? Hello I live at 317 North 12th Street, Beech Grove, Indiana, USA. PLEASE come murder me and my family

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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In Soviet Russia, this type of joke would be considered evidence to throw you into the gulag.

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What's yellow, black, and makes you laugh? A bus full of black people going off a cliff.

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Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

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Roses are red Violets are red I have Ebola

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If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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