Why did the man have a really short temper? HOW THE **** SHOULD I KNOW???

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Have you ever watched that show on Lifetime about that woman?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did Hitler say to the Nazis? I have a mustache.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock knock. Who's there? Josh. Lettuce who? I didn't say "lettuce"... I said Josh.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

thumb_up thumb_down -2

the anti-joke.com joke was just like a normal joke. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

it was all Tagart

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why did little suzy fall off the swing? she was stabbed by a drugaddict

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I saw a black dude eating fried chicken a white guy said he wanted some but the black guy said don't put your white mayonnaise on my fried delicious KFC fried chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -2

So a guy says to his dog "hey man when you piss in the toilet can you please flush, just because I don't like to look at your pee." then the dog sits back and says "...woof !!"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Did you hear the joke about the vacuum? It sucks.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my basement.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

glens walk to the kitchen : The Green Mile

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the boy trip? A small explosion in the center of the earth caused by a hobo created a tsunami, causes a seagull to fly off in alarm. The seagull lands on a Smart Car, causing it to crash, which sends a signal off to a satellite in space. Because of this, a massive earthquake occurs. Oh, and the boy? There was a bowl of soup left carelessly on the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you kill a ninja? Shoot him with a sniper rifle from a building. How do you make sure he's dead? Shoot him twice.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why didn't Sammy Robertson make the world series catch to win the series in 1977? Because Sam, like many many discouraged teens in America, didn't follow his life long dream and later became a janitor at his hometown middle-school.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Two hunters are in the woods. One of them clutches his chest, falls to the ground, and loses consciousness. In a panic, the other hunter calls 911 and tells the operator that his friend might be dead of a heart attack. The operator says "Before we send a coroner instead of an ambulance, first make sure he's dead." The hunter says "Alright." There is a pause and then BLAM! "Okay," says the hunter, "now what?" The operator follows standard procedures to keep the hunter on the phone, lucid and calm. 45 minutes later, police reach the scene, arrest the hunter and begin a months-long investigation. Forensics determines that the dead hunter was likely alive prior to being shot in the face at point-blank range. The defendant is charged with first-degree murder and receives a 30-year sentence. On the 9th year of his sentence, he is stabbed in the chest 6 times by an initiate in a rival prison gang and dies the next day. He was 53.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the blonde ask her doctor if she could get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anus surgery is the only solution.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q.How Do You Make 7 People Laugh? A.Tell Them a Good Joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

hi

thumb_up thumb_down -2

how do you make a plummer cry? you spell PLUMBER wrong

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's And add extra pepperoni

thumb_up thumb_down -2

An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops