How do you make an onion cry? Onions are incapable of crying

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A boy walked in on his mom and dad in their bedroom last night they were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

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When is a door not a door? When it is ajar.

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This sentence will not end the way you octopus.

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What's white and black and red all over A nun with a spear throug her head

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Vagina Boob

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An alcoholic walks into a bar.... I forgot the rest of the joke but your mother is a prostitute.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had escaped from the farmer's field. The family were not too disheartened, as the rest were still contained.

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what did the black women name her child jamaal

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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We just got a letter We just got a letter We just got a letter I wonder who it's from Oh look, it's a letter from our friends If there is a place you got to go I am the one you need to know I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! If there is a place you got to get I can get you there I bet I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map!

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You wanna hear a joke? Your dick.

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Why did the man fall off of his bike? Because he is a Sikh who was mistaken for a muslim after the events of 9/11. His neighbors for 5 years have turned on him and now are throwing rocks at him to alleviate their anger while he is biking to his minimum wage job as a janitor at the local burger king, trying to make money for a family that doesn't love him anymore

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What's the difference between scrambled eggs and scrambled dead babies? I don't like scrambled eggs..

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baby on board sign?? target aquired.............

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A naked man walks into a bar and is promptly arrested for indecent exposure.

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knock! knock! who's there? the police, your family died in a car crash!

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whate white and cant climb trees? powdered sugar

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what's the difference between you and a yack one is a spitting idiot and the other one is a camel

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what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

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What is the biggest lie ever? "I have read and agreed to the Terms of Use"

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There once was a man from Dundee, Whose Limericks ended on line three. I don't know why.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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