CALLER: Is your refrigerator running? OWNER: Yes, it's working just fine.

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

Many people dont know this about me, but I'm not very famous.

Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

What is the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The word anti before anti-joke.

What do you put your key on? A key chain.

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I've climbed through your window, I'm under your bed.

What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

asdasdasdasd

When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

What did the prostitute say to the president of the United States? Good morning Mr. President. She had managed to leave the sex industry, finished her education and was doing secretarial work in the White House.

Some people are like Slinkies: they don't work as well as they say they will and you'll get bored of them quickly.

what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

What did John name his dog? Doggy

What happens when your scared half to death...twice!!? Nothing, being scared half to death is an expression, you should not be fearing for your life.

What did the retarded handicap say to the bully who called him the biggest retard in the world? "atleast I didn't make SOPA"

what did the pregnant women get? A miscarriage

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven has an extra penis

"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

A man jumped off a 30 story building. What did he learn? Nothing. He died instatly when he hit the ground.

Why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...