Whatever tomorrow brings, I'll be there. Just kidding because today brought terminal cancer.

Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

knock knock whos there **gunshot ...man that gun show next door is annoying

One day a kid said to his mom: "Mom, I painted the bed sheets with your lipstick". So his mom got mad.

Two guys walk into a bar.... OUCH

knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

why did the kid sit alone at lunch? he had no friends

Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

why did the chicken cross the road? he was an escaped mental paitent

The awkward moment when you find your wife on the online dating site you are on.

Why did labour not win the election in 2010? Because they are clearly shit.

why do midgets surf in kitchens? because of microwaves.

Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

an autistic child eats its family's dogs poop and dies

Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Go fuck yourself.

What did Steve Hagen say to Steve Walters? "We have the same first name."

A man is unemployed, ugly, short, fat, smelly and stupid. That's what she said.

How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

SHUT UP JP

What is the most confusing day for chavs? Fathers day

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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