A traveling salesman stops at a farmer's house. The farmer then offers the salesman a bed with his daughter. The salesman quickly replied, "I don't want to go to bed right now. I need to know the way to Pawtucket." The farmer then gave the salesman directions and the two parted ways.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

one day ill be as old as you but you'll be older then too.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why are fish so easy to weigh? Because usually they've been killed, stunned or sedated first.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

why did the car go to the bathroom? it had gas.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the chicken cross the road?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

y was man afaid of fire?, cuz its hot

thumb_up thumb_down -11

drugs sex and alchohole are yumme as AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Two muffins were in an oven. The first muffin says: 'It sure is hot in here!' The second muffin says: 'Why are they only cooking two muffins?'

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Who doesn't love finding money in your pocket when you go to put your pants on? a rape victim

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. At what point would a chicken consciously know it was crossing a road.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do call a man with a daranged wife? Married

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Put it on my bill."

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A German, an Irishman, a Mexican and a Texan are flying together on an airplane over the ocean. When the plane begins to experience engine trouble, they find that there is only one parachute for the four of them! Through an amazing display of flying skill, however, the pilot is able to complete the flight and land safely.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

thumb_up thumb_down -11

If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the whale cross the road? He was being chased by the Japanese.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the penguin say to the other penguin? Nothing, penguins don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what's funny about cancer. nothing it is a serious life threating disease with no cure.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Knock knock who's there?... a stupid punchline because the door is imaginary and I am just wasting your time telling a knock knock joke

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops